Just starting to walk with enough confidence to let go of my hand, my son toddled around the playground at our local park, taking in the scene from a brand new vantage point. He walked around a little tunnel, where kids giggled and held a finger to their lips as they sank into their hiding spot. He went by a merry-go-round where the dad pushing stopped to ask if we wanted to join. Near the slide he passed two little girls wearing head scarfs, another one with a gigantic bow, and a boy sporting a grim reaper costume and a goofy, toothless grin.
When we stopped at the musical flowers, we were stationed next to a young girl playing alone at a giant xylophone. Out of nowhere, a little girl in a tutu skipped up to her.
“What’s your name?”
“Ilya.”
“Do you want to play with me?”
“Sure.”
And then the xylophone player dropped her mallet and ran off with the tutu girl.
My heart warmed.
While we walked around, I noticed a woman praying on a mat beside a tree, I heard at least 3 distinct non-English languages, and I saw parents of all different ages making small talk with each other. I even overheard a man reminiscing with his adult son about how ‘this is the exact park where you disappeared and almost gave me a heart attack’ as they carried a baby toward the swings.
This park felt like a big hug, like a welcoming and accepting space full of smiles. I was struck by the sense of community and by the openness that seemed contagious here. What a beautiful environment for my son to explore the world.
It was certainly not lost on me what a privilege this kind of place is. As a park planner, I know that this scene is what the professionals are shooting for. It doesn’t happen as a mistake, and it doesn’t come without investment.
From the parks department perspective, you talk with stakeholders about what is meaningful or specially needed in the area. You work with designers to create hubs of activity, places to meet others, and situations that feel safe and comfortable. And as a city or funding agent, you understand that parks like this are an investment and fund them bravely like an essential service.
It doesn’t end there.
As a city, country, and society, we have created conditions that allow for the freedom to show up in public places openly. Most basically, we have laws and policies that protect people from being hurt or punished if they express themselves. We collectively and progressively reject discrimination. Built on this over decades, we have established trust, language, and norms that set the expectation that people will be accepting of one another.
There is a lot on the line in next week’s election, not the least of which is sense of community.
Leadership matters at every level of a country. It sets an example for everyone of the type of behavior that is desirable and acceptable in a society. It communicates who is valued and what will be supported. It’s clear to me that a campaign run on love and joy will keep our beautiful common grounds safe. However, I can hardly say the same about the one run on hate and exclusion.
What happens to a park if you fear your neighbor? If you fear your country? What happens to our shared spaces if we elect someone who advocates for violence against people who are perceived as different? How quiet and cold are those monkey bars?
It has taken us a long time to get our playgrounds to reflect the high levels of inclusion and generosity that come so naturally to kids at play. What a shame it would be to let all that hard work slide.
With love and hope for the future,
Stephanie
What a great post! Thanks Dr. Lovely!
This is what we hope to develop among our students. Acceptance, respect and inclusion. Thank you for expressing it so eloquently.